Via/Follow The Absolute Greatest Posts…ever.
Oh my god my mom brought me an iced coffee when she picked me up from strength training and i was drinking it really fast cause i was so hot and sweaty but then we hit a bump in the road and it spilled aLL DOWN MY CLEAVAGE BUT IT FELT INCREDIBLE SO I MADE THIS LOUD SEXUAL MOAN AND MY MOM ALMOST CRASHED
holy shit you guys sure like my sexy near-death experiences
hey … so,.. uhh… (looks at notecards) did you uh did …you fall out of heaven because um (drops cards) shit fuck oh god fuck im so sorry youre-youre just s o.pretty i m soryr
Anyone who thinks Shakespeare is boring apparently missed the greatest stage direction ever written:
I want that to be the final line of my biography.
let’s not forget about this gem from macbeth
and, of course, from henry v
ah, the leeks.
Guys are we forgetting Titus Andronicus or
so my 16 year old brother made himself a balloon son and kept a photo album of their day together here it is
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you my boyfriend and his outstanding level of maturity.
I present the most badass gifset on Tumblr.
Legitimately turned on by this
This is the best thing.